Thursday, March 11, 2010

Moment of clarity

I recently realized that Mr. Pants is going to start Kindergarten next year. Exciting? Yes. Depressing? Yes.

I'm at a crossroad right now. Seriously considering quitting my job. I make a ridiculous salary (a good ridiculous) but I just miss my kids so much.

The Dude is in fourth grade so I've had time to adjust to the fact that he is half way to graduation. But Mr. Pants? I'm just not ready for him to be at that age where he spends the majority of his day in a schoolroom. I suppose he already is if you consider daycare, but I really think I want to quit work and spend this next year with him and all summer with both kids.

I can always go back to work next year after he starts Kindergarten... unless I decide to have another baby.

Maybe I'm a little too aware of the passage of time. I lost my dad when I was 14 and for some reason I've always held on to the fact that life is really short. Kind of a morbid way to look at it, but hey, now I'm married to a LEO.. which makes things all the more morbid.

When it comes to parenting, I know I will have regrets. I know I can't do everything perfectly. I want to feel fulfilled and I'm just not feeling that right now. I feel out of place. I don't belong in Corporate America.

We are very smart about living on one income even though we have two. We've got money in the bank and no debt except our mortgage. The hubs is all about me going back to a full-time domestic queen.

Peeps- weigh in for me, would ya? Is this a bad idea? What would you do?

Looking forward to your comments. And I'm not a sissy, so give it to me straight.

8 comments:

  1. If you have to make the ends meet go for it. Check into David Ramsey financial university that should give you insight if you can make it. Enjoy your kids!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Really it's all up to you. Personally I want to be financial secure right now so that is my priority. However my priorities are maybe mixed up. Long story.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thanks for commenting. I, too, believe being financially secure is the best thing right now. We're in really good shape with no debt except our mortgage which is very minimal and so we are just banking what I'm making. It's probably best that I keep plugging away.. even though it's hard some days :) I like to sleep in, can you tell? ha ha.

    ReplyDelete
  4. New to your blog (via Meadowlark) but love the last hours' worth of reading I've done here!

    So with that caveat - if you have stocked up on all the ammo, food, and gear you need? Quit. Now. Homeschool that wee one and love your life and your family even more.

    I know - you don't know me from Adam's housecat. But I'll tell you this. I worked 10 yrs at a place, quit, and spent a GLORIOUS year just Being Me. You will never regret it.

    Promise.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I second what LauraB said. You only get a few precious years. Don't waste them!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thanks ladies. I just remember how when Mr. Pants was born I stayed home for a year and all of us loved it. It didn't matter what shift the hubs worked, I could still have a chance to see him. And I loved being with the kids every day... Now I spend entire weekend resenting the fact that Monday morning is inevitable. Well, we'll see what happens. I appreciate the feedback and encouragement!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm a bit late to the party, but think you might find this interesting. After #2 I went back to work part time and the entire time was questioning if I should quit or continue or what. With dh's random schedule it wasn't very conducive to family unity. Anyway when I was trying to decide I saw an Oprah episode (I know, gag) that had moms on with children in the 18-26 years old age range. They had moms who worked and SAHMs. Every Single Mom said the same thing: "I wish I had done the opposite." That's right, the working ladies said they wished they had been SAHMs and the SAHMs said they wished they had worked outside the home. It made me feel a lot better to know that everyone was thinking the other would have been better. When #2 was 9 mo we took the leap for me to stay home and while I miss my job and the other part of my life that it satisfied (outside of child rearing) I do *NOT* miss working! :)

    You will make it work, whatever you decide. And it will be fabulous some days. And it will not be fabulous some days. no matter what you choose to do!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hi KD! Thanks for sharing with me! I stayed at home for 15 months after #2 and I LOVED it. Hubs did, too. But outside of that 15 months, I've worked part time since I was 14 and full time since I was 16. I felt this goofy obligation to go back to work. Dumb, YES I know :) Hubs has been encouraging me to quit since he thinks I'd be happier. He says he would be happier too. Anyway, I told myself I want to make a decision by April 30th. STAY TUNED ALL. I'll update you as I go. Thanks again.

    ReplyDelete