tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33314289059025517282024-02-18T20:20:59.258-06:00I Am The LawA thirty-something mom of four boys with a cop husband. I'm a cynic. Don't hold it against me.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.comBlogger113125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-2165071862325402462013-10-03T00:34:00.001-05:002013-10-03T00:34:53.886-05:00Only my childA police car chasing a donk. Only my child would do this! I could not stop laughing when I saw him doing this.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLI_C7x7CpQUiNdOioiThyphenhyphentapdBQxBhyphenhyphen3LPuRmEvJgWulpf2ps8Se8PYxo3hxUp5uov2CNlduXOrx8JoBzErhmP3JIhM0Blz81Ixg25DI6cucbdQuSBYVp3B-ciRMTXjFROOu-qd5uL9I/s1600/ryan3+043.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLI_C7x7CpQUiNdOioiThyphenhyphentapdBQxBhyphenhyphen3LPuRmEvJgWulpf2ps8Se8PYxo3hxUp5uov2CNlduXOrx8JoBzErhmP3JIhM0Blz81Ixg25DI6cucbdQuSBYVp3B-ciRMTXjFROOu-qd5uL9I/s320/ryan3+043.JPG" width="239" /></a></div>
BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-14304177410376785182013-10-03T00:08:00.005-05:002013-10-03T00:09:18.521-05:00Can't he just...If you've read this blog before, you've heard of the police life shitfalls our family has been through. We've been to hell and back. We've survived what I am absolutely certain are some of the hardest things any couple can face in <em>this</em> "life". <br />
<br />
Afterward people spent time telling us how proud they were of our survival, our endurance, our grace (chuckle chuckle, really??). <br />
<br />
....and then it began to fade. The reality will be ever-present for the hubs and me. But for others, even our own families-they've already forgotten.<br />
<br />
After all of the b.s. from hubs' case, he was left with no option but to take a 29% pay cut with a smaller department. The trade: it kept him in police work and it kept our family covered by excellent medical insurance. (Little did we know how important that insurance would turn out to be!)<br />
<br />
Both sides of our families have been hounding us about "Can't he switch departments? He needs to make more money! He can't work for this salary forever!"<br />
<br />
--Really? Please, enlighten me. You mean ten grand more a year would make things so much better if he (God forbid) got shot and killed or permanently disabled? You mean ten grand more a year will fully fund retirement with 4 sons? You mean ten grand more a year will help us recoup the $100,000+ that was pissed away in legal fees?<br />
<br />
When I spewed this retort, it at least shut some of them up temporarily. And now I digress....<br />
<br />
You see, hindsight is almost always 20/20. Not quite in this case, but I've certainly learned a lot over the past 5 years. (*holy hell I can't believe it's been 5 years*) I choose to see that things happened the way they did, and that while it absolutely sucked-we were blessed and fortunate in many ways at the very same time.<br />
<br />
When hubs left his old department and came to the new one, we learned his brother was dying of cancer and had only a few months to live. Those few months were whittled down to only weeks unexpectedly. We were 1,000 miles away from him and had to leave town at a moment's notice when he suddenly took a turn for the worse. The new department "carried" hubs. He hadn't earned the time off, but his command staff didn't care. They told him to go and they paid him anyway. They did the same thing a week later when we had to fly back for the funeral. His old department would NEVER have shown that kind of empathy or would have done such a thing for us. I am confident my man and his brother would never have gotten to say their goodbyes if the forced change of being at a new department hadn't happened.<br />
<br />
When we decided to have a fourth baby, we figured we knew everything. Fourth time parents=experts. Totally prepared. Every possible scenario had been thought of and planned for. Except for that whole emergency c-section (not the kind where they say oh gee we should probably go ahead and do a c-section) --the kind where the nurse jumped on top of me and screamed "holy shit, let's go, let's go, let's go" and they ran like a Jamaican bobsled team to the O.R. The total bill for saving my life and the baby's life, plus room and board was about $60,000. We only had to pay $500. If hubs had been at his old department we would have had to pay $12,000. <br />
<br />
Same basic case for when hubs had to have his gallbladder removed unexpectedly. The $15,000 surgery only cost $500 thanks to his insurance at his current department.<br />
<br />
The schedule. Well, let's face it. This is the police wife life. There is no such thing as a perfect schedule. At the old department he used to work 8 hour shifts of 6 on 3 off then 7 on 2 off. Getting vacation approved, even just 1 day, was a pain in the ass. Current department works 12 hour shifts (yes I groaned, too) but it's 2 on 3 off then 3 on 2 off-which means every other weekend off! That's twice a month we can actually go somewhere like human beings. Soccer games, birthdays, dinners, dates, weekend trips. In all the years before we couldn't get a single weekend out of town because of the shitty schedule, the lack of manpower on the old force and the general pain in the assedness of getting vacation approved. Even though it's been several years now, I still look at him like "Where the hell did you come from?" on his weekends off.<br />
<br />
So, yes, I would never want to do the going through it part again-but I think this side of things has made life better.<br />
<br />
My mom was pressing the issue tonight and I asked her if she remembered what a pain in the ass it was to spend all day applying for dozens of jobs a day a few years ago after she was laid off. She paused and nodded. I gently explained that while tedious it must've been for her, hers wasn't a 42 page application that asked every detail of her entire freaking life for the past 40 years. Where have you worked, where have you lived, have you ever been sued, have you ever paid a bill late.... her head began to spin. "And that's just the paper part. That's not even explaining yourself to a board of complete strangers live and in person!"<br />
<br />
It's probably human nature for most to want more. To need to feel better, like they're progressing or getting ahead. <br />
<br />
For me, some days just staying above ground is good. Things are just that simple. I'm happy.<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-53612660764527473862012-12-01T14:40:00.003-06:002012-12-01T14:40:46.053-06:00He Killed A Police Officer<br />
I spent yesterday in the court room with my fellow police wives and lots of men and women in blue. We attended the sentencing hearing for a thug who shot one of our officers 7 times. I posted in 2010 about the shooting here on this blog. It was a hard thing to swallow then but it was even harder to sit in the court room yesterday and listen to both the officer give his victim impact statement and listen to the stupid boob tell the court "I ain't even did nothin'."<br />
<br />
The defendant in this case is 26 years old now. He claimed he was high on marijuana and ecstasy the day he decided to pull a .40 from the backseat on a traffic stop and unload all 15 rounds, 7 of which hit the officer. He shot the officer and when the officer dove over the hood of his car and returned fire, the defendant continued to unload, even firing after the officer was incapacitated. His other claim: "it was like a dream... I thought I was playing a video game." Made me sick to listen to it.<br />
<br />
However, after swallowing the anger and rage toward this goon, the officer got up and gave his statement. I want to share since it is likely the most moving thing I have ever heard with my own two ears. This is what the officer said:<br />
<br />
"Before May 27, 2010, I did not know this man. I had never met him and I had never dealt with him in my career before nor did I know him personally. I don't know his past or what lead him to that day. I'll never know why he chose to do what he did to me. But now I'd like to tell you about me. My father is a retired officer from my same department. I remember him driving me to my little league game when I was seven years old. He turned around and looked at me in the backseat and asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I told him, "a police officer." Dad said, "No way. Anything but a police officer son." I said, "Sorry dad but that's what I'm going to be.<br />
<br />
As I grew, up I really looked up to my older brother who was a Marine. I decided that being a Marine would make me a better policeman, so at 17 I enlisted. I went to Iraq and fought in Fallujah. I considered myself lucky that during my first six month tour I was uninjured. I came home for a bit and then went back to Iraq. During that tour I was hit by a grenade. Again, I considered myself lucky for making it through. I suffered far less than a lot of guys there.<br />
<br />
When I came home from the Marines for good, I decided to live my dream and become a police officer. I loved it. I enjoyed every day. I can't describe the thrill of loading up my car and hitting the streets... seeing my buddies.. and it wasn't all about jumping out and chasing bad guys. I learned the most rewarding thing was the difference a small act of kindness could make in someone's life.<br />
<br />
On May 27, 2010, I was brutally ambushed. Over the past two and a half years I have endured more physical pain and suffering than I ever thought one person could handle. My family has suffered with me through ten surgeries, with another to take place next week. I've had flesh torn from my skin to save other areas of my body: something I never even experienced in Iraq. I've endured the emotional torment of not being able to do normal physical activities and know I will never be the same.<br />
<br />
Through all of this, no pain has been deeper, no suffering has been greater than the loss of my career. I will never again get to be a police officer, as I can no longer meet the physical requirements due to my injuries and state of disability. Just because I survived that day, just because I stand here before you today, I lost my life. That day - HE (pointing to the defendant) killed a police officer. He took my life from me and if I had my wish he'd have his taken from him."<br />
<br />
Following that statement, the judge sentenced the turd to life, plus 30 years, plus 30 years, plus 4.<br />
<br />
Justice was served. So glad he and his wife can move forward now.<br />
BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-53590096101959192832012-04-27T23:55:00.001-05:002012-04-27T23:55:43.610-05:00And here we are...The past month has been hectic, if not insane. Lots of good times with the hubs in the land of the living, the kids with a million things running us in different directions and general, overall happiness. (I know, you couldn't tell from my previous post last month, right?!)<br />
<br />
Things are changing. Mostly for the better. It is so nice to have a few months under our belts without the stress of all the job and legal b.s. I suppose the stress that comes with being a police wife is always there, but everyday things pale in comparison to what we were going through previously!<br />
<br />
For those who don't know... we are officially expecting baby number 4! The weirdos in the doctor's office hounded me with all the questions like, "Oh you must be trying for a girl finally!" and "I'll bet after all of those boys you really want a girl!" and of course the typical, "I'm guessing after this one you are DONE?" and "Don't you know what causes that?".<br />
<br />
Seriously, I had no idea four kids is considered a gigantic family these days! WTH? I didn't put in the time or effort to really answer any of them. I just smiled and thought, "Oh if I could punch you in the throat...".<br />
<br />
I mentioned in passing a while back that we moved. We have been taking care of things with our old house to get it ready for sale. It is actually quite comical that we moved when we did, seeing that I am pregnant again! The Lord works in mysterious ways. Anyhow, the old house has had a new drain system and sump pump installed and is getting a new roof on Tuesday. Then we are having new windows put in and having the fence updated. For those of you who have magical powers and special abilities, please pray or do something to help us get it sold. The sale money is going to help buy me a (can hardly get it out of my mouth).... VAN. <br />
<br />
I asked the hubs what would be wrong with us taking two cars everywhere after the baby arrives, but he didn't think this idea was very cute. I have no choice. Unless I am completely overlooking some kind of vehicle that seats 7-ish? (Ok not gonna lie, I just had to stop and count how many kids I have, er, well-will have.. yikes). I suppose a Suburban or something could do, but I really don't want to spend that kind of money!!<br />
<br />
Anyhow, thank sweet baby Jesus I still have over 500 size 1 diapers that Quinn never used, that I kept all of my maternity clothes, and that I still have ALL of the baby clothes and gear. It's quite possibly the first time things are going right from the start!<br />
<br />
Just wanted to post this update since it's been over a month since I've written anything.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-33117606025885403652012-03-26T15:02:00.000-05:002012-03-26T15:02:06.020-05:00Run For ItI'm having one of those days where I could just chuck my phone out the window and make a run for the border. I am so crabby and pissed off today it isn't anywhere close to funny.<br />
<br />
Yes, it's another day in blissdom. Today marks the start of 12 hour dayshifts for a month. That's one good thing, I suppose, in a whole mess of b.s.<br />
<br />
I'm having issues. Major issues today, and really the past couple of days.<br />
<br />
We are supposed to be going out of state for a big music deal for the kids in a few weeks. We go every year. I started reminding hubs about it months ago so he could put in for the time off (it's only one weekend). Back at the beginning of the year he told me he put in for it in writing, but with the switch to the new systems and the 12 hour shifts, they also had to put in for it electronically. <em>-Um, so?</em><br />
<br />
Now that the date is quickly approaching, he keeps telling me he isn't sure if he is going to get the time off or not because he hasn't heard back from his Sgt. Now, I know I am probably being a major bitch. I do that very well, sometimes. BUT- what I'm really miffed about is the fact that he is so ho-hum about it... like he doesn't give a sh*t. <br />
<br />
Something deeeeep down is really bothering me about it. Like he'd rather have that whole weekend to himself while I travel out of town with three small children and manage all of them during one of the biggest music events in the country. And then... it all just honestly brings me back to days of yore. You know, the ones when he was cheating on me? Yeah. <br />
<br />
Even though that was a loooong time ago, and even though things have been better than good between us for many years now, I cannot help but get angry and insecure when he acts like this. Or maybe I should say, when something like this pops up.<br />
<br />
What set me off was the tone in his voice on the phone today when I asked him if he had checked with the Sgt. In what sounded like a total bullsh*t answer, he told me the Sgt. is in court the rest of the afternoon. To boot, he just acted irritated at the very idea of having to go with me/us out of town. He made it a big deal that he had 8 car break-ins a couple of hours ago (which I am sure is a pain in the butt), but that doesn't give him the right to talk like an ass to me.<br />
<br />
It probably isn't helping that I am sick as hell with what feels like pneumonia, the baby won't stop crying today and I've got kids that require me to be in two different places at the same time this evening.. and we will get home just in time for hubs to miss ALL of the responsibility.<br />
<br />
Yes, I am feeling angry and frustrated... resentful, pissed off, etc. If I didn't blog about it, I think I'd end up going into hiding or something. <br />
<br />
Gotta go pick up the baby again. <br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-26571456891215505022012-03-21T23:41:00.000-05:002012-03-21T23:41:53.869-05:00What It Is?I am so ready for tomorrow to get here. My best friend and her hubby are coming in town from across the state. My kids will finally have someone to bug <em>besides</em> me! I will have another <strong>adult</strong> to talk to! Her hubby will be riding with my hubby at work.. this should be interesting :).<br />
<br />
Hubs has been totally rocking it at work.. locking up crazy bitches who shoot at ex-boyfriends, runs over the new girlfriend, takes out telephone poles. He's gotten a lot of guns and drugs this week and has worked two arsons. Coolio. Me.. This past week has sucked the life out of me. What did I do with my copious amounts of free time? Ahem.. let me tell you.<br />
<br />
I have dealt with homeowner's insurance people, insurance adjusters, roof people, waterproof people... the list goes on. We moved across town a while back into a bigger place as a temporary thing. We have kept our "old" house with the intention of building onto it and moving back. It's where our kids were born - call us sentimental. <br />
<br />
We had some intense storms and tornadoes here last month and with that our roof was ruined. I learned this week that what I thought would be a simple, common process is NOT simple at all. I learned that thinking of a figure in my head to cover all necessary expenses was stupid.. because the actual amount required for just ONE of the necessary projects turned out to be SIX times more expensive than that little figure I had in my head. Holy shizz!<br />
<br />
We had water damage as well, which revealed an ages old mold problem we never knew we had - which came from the previous owner who flat LIED to us about it apparently. Ugh.. I hate to even write about all of it. This week has been a $10,000 week. And it's only Wednesday. <br />
<br />
I am certain that God hates me. No, really. I'm not looking for cute reassurance. That's not a question there. That's a statement. He hates me. For real.<br />
<br />
Not sure what I did, but it sure would be nice if life could just back off with the crap sandwiches for a bit. I'm starting to understand why people go postal. Clearly some powers that be like to see me live on the edge. I keep looking for the candid camera, or thinking I'm on punk'd. <br />
<br />
Please baby Jesus. Give me a break- before <em><strong>I</strong></em> break!!!<br />
<br />
I have a bottle of strawberry stoli, a case of 7-up and a best friend who's on her way. I think things are about to turn the corner.<br />
<br />
Hoping the hubs has a good night at work because he sure was a crabass this morning!! Whew.<br />
<br />
End woe-is-me rant.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-36838315064972488142012-03-13T23:09:00.000-05:002012-03-13T23:09:05.752-05:00Do I or Don't I?The time is upon us... erm, wait. How do I begin this post?<br />
<br />
Quinn is almost 10 months old. He is adorable. He is fun. He is so stinking lovable. He is amazing. He is wonderful. All three of our boys are wonderful.<br />
<br />
Hubs is dying to have another (actually another *several*). I, in so many ways, LOVE this idea. But that's the thing. Do I understand the <em>reality</em> of this? I came to terms with the fact that going from 2 children to 3 children was the biggest adjustment of my life. Some days I think "I've got my hands full already, so, meh, what the hell?". Other days I think things like, "I am getting wayyy too old for this. Physically it's harder, emotionally it's harder to do by myself and sleep is far more precious now than in my younger days!" And quite frankly, plenty of days I actually say to myself, "Wow, what a failure (sort of jokingly) I am today. I suck at this!"<br />
<br />
Hubs gets so frustrated when I share the bad stuff with him and he gently reminds me that raising kids and managing a house is hard to do alone, even with only one child. He reminds me that he is proud of me, that he appreciates me, and that above all, the kids and I are the most important things in his life. We are his greatest source of joy. I like this part because then he starts listing off the things I never think he notices or cares much about (like always making sure there is food in the crockpot for him at any given hour, I make sure he has clean drawers ;), etc.)<br />
<br />
He also takes time to point out how rotten our children are sometimes and highlights the fact that I have more grace than I give myself credit for. He tells me to stop blaming myself for the hundreds of things the kids do on any given day that cause frustration. He tells me I am not a bad mom, that kids are a challenge and especially when they know how to wear a person down until they have no fight left to be the enforcer and daddy's not home!<br />
<br />
All of these conversations help me love him more, but especially help me love myself more. I genuinely love being a mother. Not to go psychological here, but I never got to have a close relationship with my mother. My parents divorced when I was 5 and I was raised by a single dad, until he died when I was 14. I never got to have a morning where I woke up and my parents were in the kitchen making breakfast.. or looking into the crowd at one of my sporting events to see both of my parents cheering me on, <em>together</em>. I don't even have to go into the holidays and how I don't have a single memory of a Christmas or Thanksgiving with both parents. I'm sure I sound like a million other people in the world, but to me, I promised myself that I would create those memories for my kids. I also vowed that my family would be my number one priority in life. I know I will never be rich, but know that my life will be fulfilled by the years of memories with my husband and children.<br />
<br />
I became a mother at 22. If I had another baby-RIGHT NOW-I would have raised a child at home, under my roof, for THIRTY YEARS by the time the new baby graduated high school. Sometimes I worry that there would never again be "alone time" for the hubs and me. There again, we don't have that anyway with his schedule and the children we already have! <br />
<br />
I know that my children have caused more self-realization and self-reflection than anything else I have ever experienced. I love them for that. Although it doesn't seem like it on an average basis, I know they make me a better person and help me find more love than I ever knew I had in me. When I think about the fact that the ability to have more babies is diminishing more quickly than I care to acknowledge, it makes me stop and ask myself; "Would I be ok with it if I COULDN'T have another?"<br />
<br />
Guess it's time to talk to big man. (And no, I don't mean the hubs!)<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-40011122586137659152012-02-27T19:20:00.000-06:002012-02-27T19:24:15.785-06:00March Midnight MadnessAnd so it begins... how quickly a month of days flew by. Midnight month is upon us, with tonight being night number 1. I dread this day. We took a nice little vacation over the weekend just to enjoy being a family for three days before the hubs headed to work tonight. It was great being together.<br />
<br />
I have tried very hard this past month to put measures in place which will hopefully help me get and/or keep myself together THIS month while I go it alone. I have had serious issues keeping my sh*t together. I thought back on things and realized it mostly started to unravel when Quinn was born in May. <br />
<br />
I used to be one of those weirdo women who had everything perfectly mapped out, with planners, schedules, highlighted calendars, tabbed binders with more information than anyone would ever need to retain.. and a steel trap memory to go with all of that. I could tell you what you said during lunch last Tuesday, as well as what you were wearing and what you ate. <br />
<br />
I know that is quite overboard, and nobody needs that amount of organization or memory, but- it is very missed now that it is gone. I have found myself struggling to get through ordinary every day stuff without forgetting, overlooking or getting completely distracted. My stress level skyrockets when I get interrupted, which is ALL THE TIME now that I have three boys pulling me three different directions! <br />
<br />
We have moved into a house with tons more space, which means I was able to stake an office area for myself. This is helping tremendously as well.<br />
<br />
As for managing the house, I have pulled myself together and gotten much more organized as far as getting things where they need to be. I have all of my dorky binders with color-coding and special pocket dividers put back together and organized. I have my meals planned out for the month and most already prepared and frozen, ready to throw in the oven or the crockpot.<br />
<br />
It feels soo much better living like this. The challenge will be sticking with it and not getting distracted or interrupted and letting it fall apart again!!<br />
<br />
I think the pressure to perform (as lame as that sounds) is definitely a stress factor for me. I would find all this guilt in not doing enough every day. If I made dinner, I'd feel guilty for not paying enough attention to the kids. If I caught up the laundry, I felt like it took too much time away from other things I could've been doing. I would drive myself insane thinking this way. Then the worst part is, I'd wait until all the kids were in bed and THEN try to do EVERYTHING. I'd be awake until 3am, baby would be up at 6, The Dude would be up at 7 and hubs would be home at 7:30... then Mr. Pants would be up and ready for breakfast. I was a zombie and am still catching up on sleep from this madness.<br />
<br />
I am trying not to tackle too much each day, just setting the expectation that I can get through two or three things. Hoping this helps overall, but especially during midnights this month. At least the days are getting longer and the sun is shining more. Can't complain about that. <br />
<br />
As for my friends, my best friend is coming in from across the state on the 24th! Her hubs is a K9 officer and will be riding with hubs on their first night here. This should be interesting :). I have her visit to look forward to and prepare for these next few weeks!<br />
<br />
We WILL survive the 7-7!!!<br />
<br />
Hope y'all are hanging in. <br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-28113508643197799682012-02-05T23:42:00.000-06:002012-02-05T23:46:27.424-06:00Jesus Lady (A different lady this time)Tonight.. sigh... was one of those nights. Hubs was working his 12 hour day shift. All was well. His family all came over to my house to watch the super bowl. It seemed like a nice idea. I love them. <br />
<br />
I quickly learned that what seemed like it was going to be great turned out to be rough for me. Why? Hm, let's see. A blaring tv for four hours straight. Everyone trying to yell over the loud tv for four hours straight. <br />
<br />
I was trying to cook in the kitchen, watch the baby (who you cannot take your eyes off of) out in the great room, Mr. Pants interrupted me for applesauce six times, the phone ringing, oven timers going off. It was downward spiraling. BUT, I foolishly thought, "Hm, hubs will be leaving work in fifteen minutes so it will be ok.".<br />
<br />
And then she died. I didn't know her. Some poor 41 yr old female who was insulin dependent diabetic. She was in bed. Her whole family walked in from getting fried chicken and found she had passed on.<br />
<br />
Upon hearing this tragic news, I looked to the heavens and asked, "Couldn't you have waited 15 more minutes?".<br />
<br />
Yes, I know I am going to hell. I don't need anyone reminding me.<br />
He made it home an hour late. He ate, chatted with his family until they left - and is currently passed out cold on the floor in front of the fireplace. I should go kick him. Hmmph.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-87274624539264180812012-02-05T22:03:00.002-06:002012-02-05T22:03:42.925-06:00New ToyOk so I had to share... new toy! Sig Sauer P238 blue label .380! LOVE IT. Cannot say enough good things about it! Perfect size, perfect everything. I'm in Loooooove! Taking it out tomorrow for some fun :) <br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgc-kqXRhcY4M5g6gEaLzZSdYgLuwE-9vcYz7iJ_eq5sS4FF6eNaWB2TnKE44SH_f49chfUC5b1vzo3LOCEzUqTWE7D5ldPGUWJ5T-IiicpMzyaymJrAdchImcZ4EVuOxImlJ7hU2RhMVg/s1600/P238-Nitron-detail-L.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="175" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgc-kqXRhcY4M5g6gEaLzZSdYgLuwE-9vcYz7iJ_eq5sS4FF6eNaWB2TnKE44SH_f49chfUC5b1vzo3LOCEzUqTWE7D5ldPGUWJ5T-IiicpMzyaymJrAdchImcZ4EVuOxImlJ7hU2RhMVg/s320/P238-Nitron-detail-L.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUci8lsoxcq9uDbmR6a12zS9op85Z03EVQZDrxvRynkpqzI9Sxa63FNz7dfR-kOo0uYeGzNSMDcKvIh9aJ_BGGteW4qiOvEUMxF26xmNJ0syQzviJA2QwExBYBJe8Fe4L_mvVVaXMHVPE/s1600/sig_sauer_p238.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" sda="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUci8lsoxcq9uDbmR6a12zS9op85Z03EVQZDrxvRynkpqzI9Sxa63FNz7dfR-kOo0uYeGzNSMDcKvIh9aJ_BGGteW4qiOvEUMxF26xmNJ0syQzviJA2QwExBYBJe8Fe4L_mvVVaXMHVPE/s320/sig_sauer_p238.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-26016688573816304672012-01-29T22:14:00.002-06:002012-01-29T22:14:23.622-06:00Babies eating bananasI have found there is nothing funnier than my baby eating bananas. Like a real banana, chopped into a million tiny little pieces. He thoroughly enjoyed the taste and texture, but quickly discovered it was far more interesting to squeeze and smash them between his fingers.. and THEN try to put them in his mouth. This = fun for me to watch.<br />
<br />
In other news, had a fabulous and much needed weekend of the hubs being off work! We went to dinner with the bro on Friday night and spent the rest of the weekend chilling. The in-laws came over tonight for dinner and they actually liked the dinner I made. This made me happy! <br />
<br />
The kids played outside with the neighbor girls, who Mr. Pants lovingly refers to as his "girlfriends".... I was all busy fixing the food for our dinner and happened to glance out and see all of the kids on the hill with a giant hole and a shovel. Is it bad that I cracked the door and yelled, "Where is Mr. Pants?". Once The Dude pointed to him and I was assured Mr. Pants was NOT in the giant hole in the ground, I shut the door and went back to cooking. I really didn't think to ask (until hours later) what the hell they were doing with a shovel and a giant hole. Turns out they were making an animal trap. Hm. Ok. I like that better than video games so it's cool.<br />
<br />
So... The kids are in bed, the hubs is here.. I'm going to try to catch a short movie with him before he konks out in front of the fireplace AND before Mr. Pants comes running down the hall with his midnight - drink of water, has to go pee, can't sleep, not tired, hoooooongry, bored, needs to watch a movie-episodes. <br />
<br />
Hubs starts 6:30a-6:30p tomorrow. Thank God it's back to the land of the living for a month. BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-39475831834994986572012-01-26T00:10:00.001-06:002012-01-26T00:14:30.914-06:00Yeah, OK ladySo I was reading a blog post from a woman who is also a police wife. While I think she makes some very good points almost every post, I was a little surprised by some of the things she said on this one in particular.<br />
<br />
She was going on about how our men have the toughest jobs and how hard it is on them and we should just not be b*tches and be more understanding because "what if they don't come home". <br />
<br />
And I was practically standing in my chair yelling, "Yes, what IF he doesn't come home". We live every day with that very assumption. If he doesn't come home, I'm going to do exactly what I do now. Everything. By myself. (yes I am very much generalizing)<br />
<br />
I think (and just being frank here) there are actually PO wives among us who forget that in many, many, many police marriages, the wife is every damn bit as strong as the husband. <br />
<br />
The wife is the one who manages an entire brood, defends her lifestyle and choices to friends and family who may be totally unsupportive, goes it alone day in and day out, cooks, cleans, learns to prepare for a home invasion, knows where the gun or the bat (or both) are located for handling those 'strange noises' in the middle of the night while he's out on duty...<br />
<br />
It irritates me when some police wives act as though we aren't supposed to be human beings. It is comparable to a citizen who "doesn't get it" saying - "tough shit - you knew what you were signing up for". I just think it's unfair when people - anyone- acts as though police wives are supposed to go around swearing that life is wonderful every day. Some days it sucks. Period. There is nothing that will make it better. <br />
<br />
Sometimes it sucks for a month at a time, or for years at a time if you're going through drama like an investigation, a department shake-up, a lawsuit, etc. <br />
<br />
I love hearing opinions, and lots of them; but I do not like someone telling me I don't have the right to feel overwhelmed, sad, disappointed, frustrated or any other perfectly normal human emotion because it might serve as a distraction for my hubs' job. <br />
<br />
Things don't suck all the time, but when they do - they do, and it should be ok to say it without someone criticising. Something good old Meadow said once is, "I don't go around worshipping my husband, knitting little badge-shaped slippers and baking cookies for him at 3 in the morning". And God love her, because that is the one mindset I made myself borrow from her.<br />
<br />
When my hubs teasingly asked, "Why didn't you call <u>me</u> when I didn't call <em>you</em> on my way home from work tonight?" (as I am half-snoring because it's 3am).. I replied, "Oh, I just figured you were dead." <br />
<br />
That's how we roll. Gotta keep it real.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-35001112137583413972012-01-17T00:50:00.003-06:002012-01-17T00:50:54.985-06:00Police Wifin' ItThe past three weeks (God it feels SO much longer than that) have been a major adjustment in our house. Hubs began 12 hour shifts of 6:30p-6:30a. I suppose on one hand it's nice because he works like 2 on 3 off and now actually gets every other weekend off, but holy crap. I never realized how much those 4 extra hours a day meant to us.<br />
<br />
Don't get me wrong, I am thankful as hell that he has this job, but I am struggling big time to juggle the life right now. As you all know, meals missed is a regular thing, but now we don't get a single meal a day together. He is gone before dinner and sleeps through breakfast and lunch. I have made ridiculous use of the crockpot so that there is always something hot ready for him to eat. But just watching him eat something across the kitchen, holding over the sink while we casually chat is ancient history now. God I miss that.<br />
<br />
The kids are having a hard time adjusting, too. At least I'm not the only baby ha ha! I open my eyes each day to Mr. Pants hovering over me asking in a really loud funny whisper, "Where's dad?". I guess it is now instinctual for them to start the day knowing if daddy is home or not. If he is, I am left in the dust (lol) and the pitter patter of little feet goes downstairs to jump in the pile of blankets on daddy's bed and wake him up.<br />
<br />
I know that as we have surely all experienced, as soon as I get used to this schedule, his next 7 duty days will have flown by and we will be into 6:30a-6:30p! <br />
<br />
The baby had a horrible night last night. He was up all night screaming like a banshee. Poor baby, I think it's his top teeth coupled with an upper respiratory nastiness we've been passing around. I was so tired I could barely see straight. Hubs was so sweet and helpful.. he was off last night and at one point I told him I don't know how he does it. I'd be asleep in the squad car by midnight. He smiled and said, "Eh... I'm a professional, ok?!". (mimicking the guy from Ferris Bueller's Day Off)... we chuckled and I felt my spirits rise.<br />
<br />
And then the screaming started again! It was rough and I felt defeated, but hubs stayed up with Mr. Baby and me all night helping out. It was so nice not being alone. I made sure to tell him I honestly wouldn't have survived the night without him being here.<br />
<br />
Tonight while actually carrying on a nice conversation over the phone, dispatch busted in with a burglary in progress and rattled off the description of the dirtbag. No "goodbye", just click. C'est la vie. <br />
<br />
It's the life!<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-40703140504549397152012-01-12T00:38:00.002-06:002012-01-12T00:38:52.245-06:00Be EnlightenedA wonderful video which expresses so much of what is "wrong" with public education. <br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZFcDGpL4U">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDZFcDGpL4U</a>BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-46122148279368381452012-01-08T23:35:00.001-06:002012-01-26T01:01:34.344-06:00Keep on keepin onI believe last week was an attempt to see how many doctor visits I could make. Quinn was not acting himself. He is usually quiet, mischievous and funny.. but I suddenly found him waking a lot at night, throwing himself backwards in crying fits.. so we spent Tuesday evening at the doc. He has an ear infection. Poor baby. The antibiotic is helping a lot and he's trying to get back to his little old self.<br />
<br />
Mr. Pants really wasn't acting any differently than he normally does, but he just had that "look". I'm sure any of you mothers know what I mean. He just looked not right to me. He started coughing a lot at night which is always a key that something is going on. He has a mild asthma that only acts up whenever something respiratory is happening. Thank God he doesn't have allergies. Anyhow, took him to the doc on Thursday and turns out he has a massive sinus infection and needed some more albuterol for his nebulizer. The doc had to show me the inside of his nose because I just couldn't believe it. He had no drainage, but one look with the right tool and holy cow. YUCK! He is also on antibiotics now and is doing his breathing treatments twice a day. <br />
<br />
The Dude is hanging in there. I hadn't posted this previously because, well, we had so much other crap going on...<br />
<br />
He had been tested in Kindergarten for some academic markings - and through that we found that he learns at an accelerated rate. He just "gets it". Sometimes he can't tell you how or why (as in showing you his work on math problems), but he gets the right answer every time.<br />
<br />
Throughout elementary school we struggled to help communicate this to his teachers. He would whiz through his work, finish early and then have zero realization that other kids were still learning, working or taking their test. This turned into teachers giving him extra work, busy work or simply getting onto him about being irritating. It made it unpleasant at times for the poor kid. He survived though.<br />
<br />
Now we've come into middle school. And he hates it. He is bored to death. Not in the I'm so smart and I know everything sense. But in the I-hate-block-scheduling sense. His classes meet every other day and when they do meet they are almost 2 hours in length. <br />
<br />
Here is where the new issue arose. After realizing something wasn't right, we took him again for specialized testing with the same professionals. Turns out he has a very atypical form of ADHD. (I rolled my eyes and was totally ready to dismiss this at first). ADHD-Predominantly Hyperactive/Impulsive type.<br />
<br />
I remember sitting there shaking my head "no" as the clinicians were showing me their 12 page report of findings. But then I stopped and actually listened to what they were saying. And then it all made sense.<br />
<br />
The Dude learns at such a fast pace that block scheduling is killing him. The clinician told me that The Dude learns something in 20 minutes for example and then has to sit in class for another hour and a half. It's like slow death for him. Unfortunately his teachers don't allow him to move ahead to the next assignment, the next chapter or whatever. They tell him to find something to do that will keep him busy. Which then turns into him getting antsy, impatient and impulsive. He starts doing things out of boredom without really thinking them through. There is no realization of a consequence.<br />
<br />
I told the clinician that the only familiarity I had with ADHD is that 1) it's way over diagnosed, 2) medication is pushed on those kids, 3) those kids can't control themselves and run around slapping everyone.<br />
<br />
She reassured me that it is sometimes MISdiagnosed, that medication is in fact an option for SOME kids, but NOT mine. She explained that the medication is mainly for kids who have the more typical form which involved the inability to focus or pay attention. The inability to filter out distractions. She also reassured me that not all ADHD kids run around slapping people. Sorry, that's just my humor in dealing with this.<br />
<br />
The challenge the last couple of months has been getting his school district on board with the accommodations he needs. They are slight/minimal, but for some reason the school doesn't care. It seems they aren't concerned because my son does score in the above average range on all of his standardized tests, with the exception of writing. They don't seem to care because he, by all outward appearances, is a well-adjusted kid. They also don't care because he maintains high average to above average grades.<br />
<br />
Which makes me want to shake someone. I probably sound like an overbearing crazy woman. But I see his struggles. He is my first baby. I pushed him to do everything because I thought that's what I was supposed to do. It's what is common in so much of society. Crawl early, stand early, walk early, talk early, read early.. do more, do better, do it younger.<br />
<br />
Now he is suffering the consequences of my actions. He can read at the college level. He can infer often times what the meaning is. But he doesn't have nearly the understanding he might have if the focus had been on comprehending instead of rote memorization of letters, words and sounds.<br />
<br />
I hope I can help fix this. It's really challenging to undo so many years of this. I was a public school kids and so was hubs. In an upcoming post I will talk about my thoughts and feelings on education in this day and age.<br />
<br />
I'm sure we will figure things out. Will post more later.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-65110013496646630212011-12-31T23:56:00.000-06:002011-12-31T23:56:26.158-06:002011 In ReviewAs the sun sets on 2011, I write my final post. It's 10:30pm and hubs is at work as I listen to the celebratory gunshots already ringing in the surrounding counties. He is riding in a Tahoe tonight which somehow makes me feel better. I hate when he works New Year's Eve. He works in the ghi-zet-ttto. They have shootings ALL the time, but this holiday is like anarchy. Praying all goes well and he makes it home safe.<br />
<br />
The kids are tucked in their beds (miracles do happen) and I've spent some of the quiet time reflecting on what has been a very wild ride for the hubs, for me and for our family.<br />
<br />
Here is what it is. We settled our civil suit as mentioned in my previous post. I shalln't disclose the amount, but let's say the check had a LOT of zeroes in it. Before the decimal point. And now we get to start all over saving for our three kids' college. I'm happy I don't have to spend one single day of the new year worrying, living in fear and especially not living in anger anymore. Sure I'm a little bitter, but having a ten thousand pound weight lifted off our shoulders has made me a whole new woman. Hubs and I are finally able to feel some real happiness again. It's a little easier to get out of bed and face a new day and our good times together are no longer overshadowed.<br />
<br />
I'm hoping everyone else has a wonderful New Year's Eve and a happy 2012. From our family to yours!!<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHMuQwOFrgeCzSg-rRALRdJbo3jPbM89Sf-_Oatv4AXdrDquPj1ykySr39EPlDmG9stOvLVY_FDdxotKEVrtmMk7v1vSR94XgbFPDmd9C3pxwJvmwFHoIqYutD6FBfxIER0La0K5aOfz8/s1600/101224_001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHMuQwOFrgeCzSg-rRALRdJbo3jPbM89Sf-_Oatv4AXdrDquPj1ykySr39EPlDmG9stOvLVY_FDdxotKEVrtmMk7v1vSR94XgbFPDmd9C3pxwJvmwFHoIqYutD6FBfxIER0La0K5aOfz8/s320/101224_001.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb1FHlbTm-lA7CaIvZhj1nNb2Oxh7kFgOPdYdQd9SXEFJn9qauWJVRBwEJJUI4o1Fvd5RFrRfoL3ENZSt6sHXferUZHQ-cfbJxiOVV9GQlR-Adhs44LRsBaUnoVfHHkmK75TqHVTSTGds/s1600/101224_004.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgb1FHlbTm-lA7CaIvZhj1nNb2Oxh7kFgOPdYdQd9SXEFJn9qauWJVRBwEJJUI4o1Fvd5RFrRfoL3ENZSt6sHXferUZHQ-cfbJxiOVV9GQlR-Adhs44LRsBaUnoVfHHkmK75TqHVTSTGds/s320/101224_004.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDgOjbZUmZr1AdqqnKVkgd3PPSmrAsJv0BiEvnztdE1TYE9yA42CZac4s5aWQu1Pd5zRcEqqReSWNhgb9N1OfgYQibm92x8xlLpE17o2CYmxxieiwUXUDdIN0u6uO0F63FqON05p_Q85g/s1600/110820_002.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDgOjbZUmZr1AdqqnKVkgd3PPSmrAsJv0BiEvnztdE1TYE9yA42CZac4s5aWQu1Pd5zRcEqqReSWNhgb9N1OfgYQibm92x8xlLpE17o2CYmxxieiwUXUDdIN0u6uO0F63FqON05p_Q85g/s320/110820_002.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoj7XT2N1Ilfu4SIqScBCtvN6A5cJNhvsZnJ6hO55NJ3BHyXdl4IZrIal7nsMXKccncS5m2oha8TYIZaoRB7CsbbKkMB03_j8-QumrcDrSVfD766b_WnWBEpvSoIivvtul8z6e4lxuSRs/s1600/110820_004.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoj7XT2N1Ilfu4SIqScBCtvN6A5cJNhvsZnJ6hO55NJ3BHyXdl4IZrIal7nsMXKccncS5m2oha8TYIZaoRB7CsbbKkMB03_j8-QumrcDrSVfD766b_WnWBEpvSoIivvtul8z6e4lxuSRs/s320/110820_004.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOThoAiek6vy6H-fLp9wqYUeqH9gT_O3ewdWJo_6HTnx9a3nzm24w5EjPuCkT7-W97gEIGt_ro8J5EhPQiP-pNoWX1qUKhtXuF4pxpEZ70w7ETX0L8K5wtVp3JdcziFjc3OM8vGcg1a94/s1600/110822_001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOThoAiek6vy6H-fLp9wqYUeqH9gT_O3ewdWJo_6HTnx9a3nzm24w5EjPuCkT7-W97gEIGt_ro8J5EhPQiP-pNoWX1qUKhtXuF4pxpEZ70w7ETX0L8K5wtVp3JdcziFjc3OM8vGcg1a94/s320/110822_001.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigwoyWjqJ3yqSW0e9a3EvvkL7icNtszpPctqmOE7OfjmSlwwjT6b9r7HnsbKx-0Bg7zVjBSQRU5AQhlSNFtt6MIYKQd_PJ7VZDQx3_PHJ5PWgrKiu8j3-kh38dbLKF2epPGR3YVhOle6Q/s1600/110918_002.a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigwoyWjqJ3yqSW0e9a3EvvkL7icNtszpPctqmOE7OfjmSlwwjT6b9r7HnsbKx-0Bg7zVjBSQRU5AQhlSNFtt6MIYKQd_PJ7VZDQx3_PHJ5PWgrKiu8j3-kh38dbLKF2epPGR3YVhOle6Q/s320/110918_002.a.jpg" width="196" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2OY8aV02ugdNOKtF23Nun6okWBWPBCy8QeSRWZ1mAWsgGY1Nk6eRh-5GqtOqDe2L3XjK6Jbl3_ApfiHCpaapz3ISC4lWyb9KArrCErj2bSFGZnEclQUlenBvn3VA07DJgHmLwhAWtO_I/s1600/111026_002.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2OY8aV02ugdNOKtF23Nun6okWBWPBCy8QeSRWZ1mAWsgGY1Nk6eRh-5GqtOqDe2L3XjK6Jbl3_ApfiHCpaapz3ISC4lWyb9KArrCErj2bSFGZnEclQUlenBvn3VA07DJgHmLwhAWtO_I/s320/111026_002.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcZlSWakazaYLnmGE-ybOENtMDtwwTzqJhkynBId-NEDP16gLuCkDmbpg6Yru21gLqHSNGC-E2_lDDRJypnQOiNdJnQziGZVWCFe1vsX74wiwUwowvGgpMHfpe9PlPWd5nVgu64oRoplo/s1600/111030_001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgcZlSWakazaYLnmGE-ybOENtMDtwwTzqJhkynBId-NEDP16gLuCkDmbpg6Yru21gLqHSNGC-E2_lDDRJypnQOiNdJnQziGZVWCFe1vsX74wiwUwowvGgpMHfpe9PlPWd5nVgu64oRoplo/s320/111030_001.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCmsoBD8hnfBXdwO-rut15BTnZbfqxfVacl29E3nv0yxo3acW6_k4eFGyvJrTEivLy1u9RjAJLaXpzJkdjuiuaD1jdLLwmfjb6fAEhB1LJt-rCiysl2DaoQUuGHlUhSXASjeWn5mRXwoU/s1600/111106_002.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCmsoBD8hnfBXdwO-rut15BTnZbfqxfVacl29E3nv0yxo3acW6_k4eFGyvJrTEivLy1u9RjAJLaXpzJkdjuiuaD1jdLLwmfjb6fAEhB1LJt-rCiysl2DaoQUuGHlUhSXASjeWn5mRXwoU/s320/111106_002.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCPhDWdY__VyfLhyieQI9csfhl1-WwM-Y_LF3daguPS1biRHoXq_WDTGgTW6FDIbdqxGyMaLH8dNKT0NpjJVyuCHIF29hiqFL-UpwBP2NcbSrg7o9fw2k_wvRNBUKkV7OPpT2BC15ZMBY/s1600/Photo0229.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCPhDWdY__VyfLhyieQI9csfhl1-WwM-Y_LF3daguPS1biRHoXq_WDTGgTW6FDIbdqxGyMaLH8dNKT0NpjJVyuCHIF29hiqFL-UpwBP2NcbSrg7o9fw2k_wvRNBUKkV7OPpT2BC15ZMBY/s320/Photo0229.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-IaPyVS5qMjDZy0YpnJtKHJNZT9XN4UpWB6WcbpAFRQPd17Eufr0uxe2sVq5BrlRrjBG4uZy_e3T8I2oRwC6nivzBT8aaJ3tA_2F9dUNiQWryouD9-T4wZ6WnNbTuW9-_lGkOp-s8Tww/s1600/Smiley+mumps_001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" rea="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-IaPyVS5qMjDZy0YpnJtKHJNZT9XN4UpWB6WcbpAFRQPd17Eufr0uxe2sVq5BrlRrjBG4uZy_e3T8I2oRwC6nivzBT8aaJ3tA_2F9dUNiQWryouD9-T4wZ6WnNbTuW9-_lGkOp-s8Tww/s320/Smiley+mumps_001.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<object id="BLOG_video-UPLOADING-0" class="BLOG_video_class" contentid="UPLOADING" width="320" height="266" ></object></div>BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-87619554915856095152011-12-05T22:21:00.001-06:002011-12-05T22:23:14.010-06:00Still Hanging InWhere has time gone? Wow.. well, here is a bit of good news. The civil suit; FINALLY OVER. It was set for trial today, but we settled out of court. I will surely create a long, detailed post to let you all know the glorious details. I cannot believe it is finally, FINALLY, over.<br />
<br />
Gearing up for Christmas. Mr. Chunky Munkerson just turned 6 months old and The Dude and Mr. Pants are keeping me running in circles. <br />
<br />
Hope everyone is well. Photos and stories to come soon.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-906920514282444632011-10-17T00:05:00.003-05:002011-10-17T00:05:53.545-05:00Our AssociationI am loving my fellow police wives and our police wives association. We had an awesome dinner out the other night. It was sooo awesome to be around women who understand.. who don't look at you crooked or make the "hair face" (you know, that face every human being makes when cleaning out the hairbrush) when I talk about finding bullets in the cupholder of my car.. or uniforms with a million bits of notebook paper folded up with names like KiKi and a birthdate of 2/20/86. Ya know, that could either be a victim of a crime or a stripper.. most of us p.o. wives know it's the former, not the latter.<br />
<br />
It is so nice to be in the same room at least once a month with women who can say things like, "Grab my camera out of my purse for me - but watch out so my .380 doesn't fall out!". Breath.Of.Fresh.Air. Ahh.<br />
<br />
This time of year is going to get very busy. Lots of community outreach type of activities coming up. It's going to be a lot of work, but a lot of fun.<br />
<br />
My girls were there for me this week, the one I like to call HELL WEEK.. the last week of midnights. The one that takes FOREVER and will not end. <br />
<br />
Hubs and I had a little spat but it was one that we both needed to have. He came home at 7am and went straight to x-boxing (yes I made that verb up). When he emerged at 10am I laid into him about how it would be nice if he actually came home and spent time with me BEFORE our house turns into wild kingdom. He told me that he comes home wired after midnight shift and can't just lay down and relax. "I can't just turn it off..." He said it all indignant which pissed me off. So I told him, "Oh-I'm sorry, as if I don't lie awake half the night worrying about you only for you to come home and go into your cave?! It's not like <em>I</em> can just turn it off EITHER. You may know what it's like to be a cop, but you have no idea what it's like to be a cop's wife." It actually gave him pause. He apologized, I apologized.. all was right in the world again. <br />
<br />
Midnights is the worst thing on earth for me. I feel like time actually goes <em>backwards</em>. His shifts change every 4 weeks and it is hardest for our family during midnights.<br />
<br />
Thank God for my gals, the ones who understand, the ones who don't require explanation, the ones who go through the exact same things!!!<br />
<br />
Our anniversary is Saturday. My gift from him? <strong>THE END OF MIDNIGHT SHIFT ON FRIDAY!!</strong><br />
<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-23459444490892094312011-10-10T00:10:00.007-05:002011-10-10T00:17:25.765-05:00Texts Between UsI received a huge bunch of crap from hubs last night about the fact that I used coupons for certain things on my quick shopping trip. He asked if I am going to become an extreme couponer and so on...<br /><br />He sent me this text just now:<br />"I love u mama"<br /><br />To which I replied, "Well..sorry, I don't have a coupon for that, but I guess since love is free I love you too."<br /><br />His response: "I have a coupon. It says 'good for your wife's pants half off'."<br /><br />My reply: "You should see the face I just made.. and now I'm laughing."<br /><br />Him: "I bet it's beautiful."<br /><br />And that, folks, is why we are still married. :)BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-89522586186541495612011-08-17T22:14:00.011-05:002011-08-17T23:03:42.074-05:00ThinkingWaiting for hubs to get home. I know I vent a lot on this blog. I used to post a lot of really great things and happy stuff. As much as I sound miserable, I am happy in here somewhere :)
<br />
<br />So, with all the boys in bed I sat on the couch and thought.. just thought about hubs and us and times gone by. Here are some of the things I was thinking about. Enjoy.
<br />
<br />I love that hubs will lie next to me pretending he's asleep and as soon as I close my eyes, I can quickly open them to find him looking at me with a little grin. Just admiring me (is there really something left to admire?)
<br />
<br />When he calls me on his way home from work, he asks me if I'm "watching our show". Our show happens to be MY show.. a SOAP OPERA. I find it totally hilarious that as humiliating as it is for him to admit it, he is totally hooked and refuses to go more than a couple of days without pulling it up on the dvr. Cute. I know it's just because he thinks the one chic is pretty smokin'.
<br />
<br />I love that I can kick him right in that side part of your shin that hurts like hell, right on the pressure point, and he will instantly know that means "get up and bring me the crying baby" in the middle of the night. I don't even have to say a word. He stumbles in to get him and brings him to me.
<br />
<br />I think it's really hot that he wrestles me when I try to play hard to get when I'm tired and crabby.
<br />
<br />I like that he forgives what I can only refer to as my "Kate Gosselin moments". Ok I'm not nearly as vile as that woman, even on my worst day. But I do admit to being pretty bossy now and again. There is a specific way things have to run and that way is 99% my way. Not because I'm a control freak per se, but because he isn't HERE most of the time so I have to keep order. He understands that and loves me anyway.
<br />
<br />Our humor is what I think keeps us going. We are able to poke fun and joke with each other. We may not say "I love you" as much as we should, but he says to me, "Thanks for not divorcing me" and I say in return "Not yet anyway". Then we both chuckle and he smacks me on the rear.
<br />
<br />Sometimes I want to throw something at him, or change the locks. But, at the end of the day most days I love him even more.
<br />
<br />Here is something read at our wedding ceremony: The Art of a Good Marriage by Wilferd Arlan Peterson
<br />
<br />The little things are the big things
<br />It is never being too old to hold hands
<br />It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day
<br />It is never going to sleep angry
<br />
<br />It is never taking the other for granted;
<br />the courtship should not end with the honeymoon,
<br />it should continue through all the years
<br />
<br />It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives
<br />It is standing together facing the world
<br />It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family
<br />
<br />It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy.
<br />
<br />It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways.
<br />It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have wings of an angel.
<br />
<br />It is not looking for perfection in each other.
<br />It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor.
<br />
<br />It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
<br />It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.
<br />It is finding room for things of the spirit.
<br />It is a common search for the good and the beautiful.
<br />
<br />It is not only marrying the right partner, it is <em>being</em> the right partner.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-37954989715856401242011-08-11T22:37:00.003-05:002011-08-11T22:44:29.389-05:00A Little Less BitchyJust for you ML :). Thanks for the advice... so here is a post that puts a smile on my face.
<br />
<br />First, my bro just got hired on at my father in law's department!! It's a $12,000 a year pay increase, better benefits and, well, a better department! I'm so proud of him and happy for him. As I like to put it, from the hood to the burbs will be a nice change!! Woo hoo.
<br />
<br />Secondly, I survived middle school orientation with three kids in tow. I think I left my sanity at the door, but we made it out alive. I'm so not emotionally ready for my son to start middle school. I actually WANT my son to be innocent and naive and all of those things.. but times are different. When I got a glimpse of the female P.E. uniforms I nearly fell out. I didn't know a 2 inch inseam was appropriate for 11 year old girls. Wow. Ok.
<br />
<br />Which makes me feel compelled to share with you a real live conversation from my shopping trip for school supplies. God's honest truth.... from the two ladies walking behind us:
<br />
<br />"MMM MM MM.. she is so blessed. 3 boys!"
<br />"Girl you know that's right.. Lord knows this world is full of waayyyy too many skeezas! She is bringin' us the men we neeeeed!"
<br />
<br />The Dude turned to me and asked, "Mom, what's a skeezer?".
<br />
<br />Ah the joys of motherhood. :)
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-30575515055122506772011-08-09T22:50:00.002-05:002011-08-09T23:12:52.598-05:00RockyUgh.. I am so displeased. Yep, sorry to start this post off so negative. Mr. Baby is now 11 weeks old.. Jesus where does time go? I spent 4 out of these 11 weeks with hubs on mids, which SUCKED. Two kids who cry at bedtime because daddy is leaving for work and then all night with a newborn, then ALL day with two older kids while hubs tries to sleep.
<br />
<br />But what I'm displeased with is myself. I have had no grace whatsoever these past few weeks. Sleep deprivation, stress (more on that later) and loneliness. It all got the best of me and spilled over last night.
<br />
<br />Hubs is on noons now, which makes life, erm, somewhat easier. However, I am an idiot and I bought him an x-box for father's day in May (PRE-baby arrival). Yeah, well I've been going through this thing where whenever I want to actually spend time with hubs home and conscious, he is too tired to enjoy or be enjoyable, either one. But, BUT, if I fall asleep on the couch mid-sentence, he doesn't prod me to get up and come to bed. Nope. He leaves me on the couch and goes downstairs and plays the damn x-box... until 4a.m..... until he's so tired that he stumbled back upstairs, wakes up the baby and then tells me he's too tired to help me. Then the morning hours while he's actually home and 'available' to do something with me and our kids who miss him, he's zonked and snoozing.
<br />
<br />So, last night I pretended to be asleep on the couch after a bit of him being home from work. Sure enough, he crept downstairs and played stupid x-box until 4am. When he crept back upstairs to the couch, where he was no doubt going to pretend he'd been the whole night, I let him fall asleep there. And a good 15 minutes into his slumber I grabbed him by the ankles and pulled him off the couch and yelled, "Wake your ass up... you woke me up, now the baby is up and if we can't sleep, neither can you!". I was a real b****. I hadn't meant to go that far, but something sorta.. erm, snapped?
<br />
<br />He got up and helped me get the baby back to sleep.. then I tore him up one side and down the other for a good hour. I half yelled, half cried.. mostly sounded crazy, but all made sense. Yeah, it was bad.
<br />
<br />Why, might you ask, was I such a raging loony? Well, several reasons. Wayyyy back in the day my prince charming had a minor indiscretion. And we happened to run into that minor indiscretion out in public recently... where she proceeded to look directly at him and say to him, "Hi, it's so nice to see you", RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. Thank God and sonny Jesus my brother was there to physically restrain me. Hubs had what I would consider to be his first shining moment when it came to handling her, and told her not to ever speak to him again. So that helped in that moment.. a little anyway. I suppose I've been stewing a bit and the fact that I'm still trying to shed 15 extra pounds of baby weight doesn't help my confidence. Plus, I took his recent actions with the x-box to be a sign of disinterest in me, our family and our life in general. I told him that he doesn't realize that we all literally sit around waiting for him to be available. And when he becomes available, we'd really like to be penciled in.
<br />
<br />It also doesn't help that the civil suit is set for a September trial, but things are in the works to settle without a trial. Pros- no more media, plus gag order, plus SCREW them. Cons- they want money and while we can throw a stupid amount of money their way, it's money that takes away from our future and our kids' futures. That has both of us very peeved and while we are definitely a united front, we are both just beaten down.
<br />
<br />Every GOOD thing in life has been overshadowed by all of this legal b.s. It's sooooo exhausting and I'm honestly just ready to get it over with.
<br />
<br />Lastly, while I'm telling you this "It's A Wonderful Life" tale, we were tipped off that the local media is going to do a spread on hubs and how he's such a horrible guy that they can't believe he's working as a police officer again. They contacted his Chief and asked him to confirm hubs is an officer at his department. The good news is, the Chief used to be a supervisor on hubs platoon at his old department before he came here. They have a long working history and the Chief prepared a kick ass statement backing up hubs.
<br />
<br />I'm glum and self-loathing. Yes, I do sound like a miserable person because lately I AM a miserable person. And after feeling so good about unloading on hubs and his selfishness, I realized, darn. The poor guy is just trying to do something for himself and I just ripped him a new one.
<br />
<br />I keep praying for strength and faith and perseverance. I don't want to understand, I just want to get through all of this. I know that's incomplete thinking, but I want to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-37000455276332837522011-07-04T23:31:00.005-05:002011-07-04T23:49:57.360-05:00In A NutshellIt's been a long six weeks. Yep, six weeks already. Quinn is doing awesome, almost sleeping through the night (hoping I didn't just jinx as I type this with very tired eyes). He is getting so big already.. 10 pounds!<br /><br />The Dude and Mr. Pants have taken to him very well. They love helping with holding the baby and bringing me diapers. The only thing I'm trying to work on is keeping them entertained while juggling the household duties as well as take care of a newborn.<br /><br />In other news, on June 2nd, my step-dad was hospiced. We'd known for about 18 months he was considered terminal, but he worked every day until May 25th. Then he became weak and took a very sudden nose dive. That was right around the time we were told his chemo stopped working. Hospice came in and took great care of putting up with us and keeping us all sane. He succumbed on June 22 with all of us by his side. He was 56 years old.<br /><br />It was really hard to watch the dying process again. I went through it with my dad when I was a teenager and then again last year with my brother in law. It sucks. It really sucks. It sucks that you know what is coming, you see all the indications, and there is nothing you can do. What's worse is that you aren't supposed to do anything. We all have an instinct to rescue when someone is hurting, but in all three cases I was expected to stand back and let it happen. There is an overwhelming sense of guilt and agony that comes with that.<br /><br />But it's what he wanted. To be freed from the pain of prostate and bone cancer. And I've never known anyone to go out exactly how they wanted in a cancer situation, but he DID. He was at home, no hospitals and surrounded by family.<br /><br />I'm glad he got to meet Quinn and that we all got to hang out with him his final few weeks before he got really bad.<br /><br />Since then, hubs is back on midnites, the idiot neighbors are still popping off fireworks and the big boys are not asleep yet. It's been a long day and a long bunch of weeks. Just thought I'd drop a line. Take care.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-13674017171275335642011-05-25T18:14:00.005-05:002011-05-25T18:28:51.690-05:00He's Here<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2m6M_fThpTeeIoFl0W51qNQ-32cXTTkEV8i9LIovG4-J8cMaPiwTtKaA0Fh6lRU-tyR485TG0-HfLj-gbaxys-gWD4KfH8sTkuHEg9YYsi9Gd1X3yVrNQDeQwYsB_4hyphenhyphenNY-l7Z-RC908/s1600/QuinnBlog.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 283px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5610796328202076034" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2m6M_fThpTeeIoFl0W51qNQ-32cXTTkEV8i9LIovG4-J8cMaPiwTtKaA0Fh6lRU-tyR485TG0-HfLj-gbaxys-gWD4KfH8sTkuHEg9YYsi9Gd1X3yVrNQDeQwYsB_4hyphenhyphenNY-l7Z-RC908/s320/QuinnBlog.JPG" /></a><br />I started contracting on Friday night while at the in-laws. Hubs and I put on our walking shoes and got moving. Before we knew it, we were at the hospital and I was 3cm dilated. They sent me to walk around the floor some more. From midnight until around 6am I stayed active and kept trying to keep things from stalling. It was then that I found out my doctor had "signed off for the weekend" as the nurse put it. <br /><br />As you can imagine, I was NOT thrilled at the idea of having a doc I'd never even met delivering my baby. But, I suppose I had no choice. So I labored until around 3:45pm Saturday. Then I was at 6cm. The phantom doc directed the nurse to give me <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">pitocin</span> to "speed things up". In it went, up it cranked and at 5pm I was 8cm. <br /><br />Here is where I will say if you've never had <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">pitocin</span>, you've never been tortured. It is like slow death, every forceful contraction squeezing the life out of you. It was at this time the phantom doc showed his face finally.. this James Lipton looking fellow came in and sat at the end of my bed. I'd even go so far as to say he was a little creepy. He looked at me with a slight grin and asked if I felt like pushing.<br /><br />Um, hello. There I was, on my hands and knees, butt hanging out for all to see and who the hell is this guy?? Am I SUPPOSED to wanna push? So, I decided to bear down just a little and at that point I realized I was just there and my body was in full command. I turned around, fell backwards on the bed (pretty sure I died for at least 10 seconds), an anesthesiologist walked in to offer me an epidural (are you effing kidding me, hello I'm at TEN CENTIMETERS) and three pushes later, the baby was born. I was in such a state of shock I kept looking for the baby. Turns out he was on my tummy the whole time. Talk about the biggest adrenaline rush of my life. <br /><br />Zero pain <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">meds</span> made this one of the most interesting experiences of my life. I think if I could have foregone the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">pitocin</span> it would have been nothing short of perfect. For me, I wouldn't trade it though. My baby arrived perfectly alert, perfectly content and beautiful. Welcoming my sweet little one was one of the happiest moments of my life.BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3331428905902551728.post-69685683256145577112011-05-16T19:02:00.002-05:002011-05-16T19:05:27.217-05:00Baby News #2It's been a week since my last check up and I am now 2cm dilated and still about 50% effaced. Doc said, "This baby has come down a TOOONNNN" and that all I need is the barometric pressure to change and that he will see me in Labor & Delivery! <br /><br />He said that "This will be a very fun and exciting week for you guys!". Told me to schedule for Monday but that he'd see me in L&D most likely before that.<br /><br />I'm getting more excited, but know with this being #3 things are unpredictable and you just have to see what happens.<br /><br />I think it would be really awesome to have him on the 19th. That was my dad's birthday!!!!!!! Anywho, be on the lookout for updates and photos soon!!BunnyOhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16772001159931488579noreply@blogger.com2